Minnesota Decoy Show Outrage: Linguistic Update

A distinguished Western correspondent suggests that your reporter might reasonably have substituted another word for Luddite: At least equally appropriate would have been "troglodyte."

Possibly I pushed the use of the word Luddite a bit, tho the dictionary I consulted just now says in part: "broadly : one who is opposed to especially technological change" but technological progress clearly requires scientific research, and our friend Host certainly expressed his lack of enthusiasm for the latter.

Another dictionary offers "opposer" and "resistor" for "Luddite", and I think this gentleman clearly qualifies on both counts.

Merriam-Webster Online does support troglodyte, however: "1 : a member of a primitive people dwelling in caves 2 : a person resembling a troglodyte (as in reclusive habits or outmoded or reactionary attitudes)". Well, the Noble Host did lure into his cave those who sought only to slake their thirst for knowledge, rather like Polyphemus luring Odysseus and his crew into his cave.

I guess our Hero and his companions were lucky to get off as easy as they did, especially given their entire lack of a sharp stick: they could have ended up in the Cyclops' soup. So I think this would be an appropriate use of the term troglodyte, especially given his in this author's opinion outmoded and notably reactionary attitudes.

Discussion is available in the Comments section.

UPDATE: Our esteemed Western correspondent writes again to suggest a new-coined term which might cover the bases: trogluddite.

Minnesota Decoy Show: Neo-Luddite assails Scientific Research

In one of the most shocking episodes of recent times, a prominent Wisconsin decoy collector manifested an apparent anti-scientific bent by most cruelly criticizing a noble researcher just as the latter's efforts were bearing fruit.

Late Thursday evening the Luddite was plying several room-hopping low-li....that is, hospitably serving his distinguished guests some excellent wine, when one of them with a serious interest in discovering the secrets of the old decoy makers (inspired by the pioneering efforts of Joel Barber himself) seized upon the opportunity which the gracious host had unwittingly provided.

Seated on the floor, our Hero noted that the cranial portion of a Gus Moak canvasback decoy (Aythya valisineria pseudoduxii), priced at $3800 dollars, was quite loose. There have been assertions that The Noble Moak attached heads with a double-pointed screw and three finishing nails. It was clear to our young Archimedes that the nails had been broken or cut, and that the cranium could be removed for scientific inspection of the fastening mechanism by the application of continuous pressure by the distal portion of one meta-phalange, applied to the tip of the bill in a counter-clockwise direction.

Having successfully done so, this intrepid Magellan of the Arts thoughtfully placed the body back on the bed and examined the cranium, which proved of such absorbing interest that he is believed to have reported "Hey, this is a pretty nice head."

Our Luddite, however, glancing proprietarily at his bedfull of decoys, discovered the decapitated corpse of Moak's $3800 marvel which some have indeed likened to the after-class remains of a frog in Freshman Biology class, a frog which, mind you, had selflessly given its life in the pursuit of Education & Progress. Friend Luddite hyperventilated. He sputtered like an old jalopy. His eyes fluttered like those of a barn owl in the mid-day sun. He became red as a fine Burmese ruby.

Painful though it is to report, gentle reader, he expressed a lack of appreciation for our Hero's serious scientific endeavors and a complete lack of awareness of the societal importance of pure research. Yes, it is a sad tale, but true, (at least according to some witnesses who were admittedly of somewhat impaired observational reliability). If such attitude spreads, at least one observer fears that we may have witnessed one of the harbingers of the fall of Western Civilization as we know it.

UPDATE: I fear the Kindly Host referred to above has commented in what some might consider an intemperate vein: "Sputter my a**! Hyperventilate ditto!" I note that he does not deny turning red as a Burmese ruby, fine or otherwise, nor that his eyes fluttered like an owl. He continued, however: "This esteemed decoy collector thinks research should be conducted when performed on one's own property - how do you want to pay for the aforementioned Moakl?" Sigh. I was under the impression that he was a true aficionado of the Immortal Moak's polychromed wood sculptures, and that as such he knew full well that they are beyond price.

Minnesota Decoy Collectors' Show

Tomorrow morning I am off to Bloomington MN for the state decoy collectors' get together. The Thunderbird Motel is right across the parking lot from the Mall of America, which is pretty big as malls go. One used to be able to trek right across the parking lot to mallize, but a couple years ago the security conscious types spent a lot of money to put up a chainlink fence, so now one must hop in old NellieBelle and motor over. If so inclined.

I intend to hit an art museum and also visit a couple of area decoy collectors to ogle their goods. The Minneapolis Art Museum has two nice Tahitian period Gauguins and a van Gogh Olive Grove, and lately someone has been throwing some pretty serious shekels their way in order to put together a collection of Oceanic art, another interest of mine. They haven't bought a lot, but it is seriously hi quality, so it is always fun to see what they might have added since the last visit.

I suppose I should check the weather report, it sometimes gets nippy up there. About ten years ago or so, people were standing around outside throwing cups of hot coffee in the air, and the coffee never hit the ground. Just froze and blew away. That was pretty cold, even by the locals' standards. It was -60 a bit north of there, and I guess that was pretty tough on the malarial mosquitoes as I've never seen one up there since.